“When you see what you’re here for, the world begins to mirror your purpose in a magical way. It’s almost as if you suddenly find yourself on a stage in a play that was written expressly for you.” – Betty Sue Flowers
You’ve given birth to and are responsible for another human being. Nothing else is more important than the role you play as a nurturing and caring mother.
And as a mom it’s easy to be completely consumed by that role, to essentially lose yourself in it and forget that motherhood is only one aspect of your life. This is particularly true of full-time stay-at-home moms.
I know for me when I became a mom it felt like I finally had a purpose and something meaningful to do. I’m sure this is largely because I didn’t have much going on before I became pregnant unlike many women who had inspiring and fulfilling careers before motherhood. I was not one of those women.
But whether you did have a full life or not before motherhood many of us still found ourselves fully engaged in being a new mom and all that it entails.
We joyfully (or not) gave up our careers and past lives for a new life as a mom. We were excited and full of hope for what starting a family would mean and how it would enhance our lives.
Then one day we woke up and the honeymoon was over. We discovered that motherhood isn’t all we thought it was cracked up to be.
We found ourselves overwhelmed, frustrated, irritable, crazed, tired, and bored out of our minds with the monotony and routine of it all.
The kid(s) are driving us crazy, no actually insane and we are at our wits end. If I hear one more time that it’s just a phase I’m going to scream because we all know that when one crazy ass phase ends another one begins.
Or that it all goes by so fast so enjoy it while it last. Yeah, yeah. Is it too soon for me to start packing up my little one for college?
I joke of course. I do know that the next 14 years, 9 months and 26 days when I really do have to pack up my youngest will go by way too fast. But right now motherhood is freakin’ hard.
Yet despite the boredom, craziness and overwhelm it is also full of surprises, joy, tender moments, and happy times and I do cherish these.
I also am fully aware that I want more…more joy, more me time, more self-care, more creative outlets, more freedom, and more fulfillment…And many of you do too!
So I ask you what are you going to do about it?
Even if you still have little ones who require your full-time attention and care it’s not too soon to start thinking about what your next big act is going to be.
What do you want to give birth to next (and I’m not talking about another baby)? I’m talking about your next project, creative endeavor, a business idea, or a self-care plan.
Give yourself permission to dream and explore what’s possible for the next phase of your life. The new life you are ready to create with kids in tow.
What deep desires have you been ignoring?
What do you love to do? ~ What lights your fire? ~ What are you passionate about? ~ What’s your favorite thing to talk about?
What is your life purpose, your reason for being, your true calling?
What are you really good at? ~ What is you unique genius? ~ What comes easy to you? ~ What are your strengths, gifts and talents?
How do you really want to spend your days?
How do you want to serve and contribute?
What big or small dream have you put on the back burner?
What part of your life have you neglected and is now begging for your attention?
Well, it’s time to stop ignoring that inner nagging and start nurturing yourself and your passions.
Spend some time reflecting and doing some deep soul searching on who you are and what you really want for yourself.
Pay attention to what keeps showing up. Notice what you are always drawn to and what you are doing when you lose track of time.
Remember, your dreams and passions can change over time so this by no means is set in stone, but notice what is speaking to you now. What are you feeling compelled and lead to do as your next project?
Are you itching to start a business, write a book, start a blog, throw a party, lose 20 pounds, run a marathon, or just take a dream vacation without the kids?
Whatever it is begin it!
“Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets: “Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now!” – W.H. Murray
Commit to giving birth to your ideas, dreams and desires.
And then at the very least take one small step towards making them happen. Small steps will lead to bigger ones and one day you will be way down the path towards fulfilling your ideas and plans for more.
You are more than the butt wiping, breast feeding, stroller pushing, diaper bag toting, grocery shopping, short order cooking, laundry folding, house cleaning slave that everyone in your world seems to think you are.
You are a brilliant, creative, fabulous, talented, complex, passionate, hot, sexy mama.
It’s time to honor all you bring to the table besides your cooking, cleaning and chauffeuring skills.
Stop wasting your brilliance and talents on the dirty dishes and teach your seven year old how to load the dishwasher.
Find 5 minutes, 20 minutes, or an hour or two when you can to squeeze in time for yourself and your passionate pursuits.
And trust that one day you will look up and yes your kids will be grown and gone but you will still have your own life to nurture and ideas to give birth to, which you can start doing now even in the midst of the chaos and joy of raising a family.
- Reflect on what you really want to do as your next big act.
- Find at least an hour a week to work on your thing. Add more time when you can.
- Take three small steps over the next week or two to pursue something you really want to do.
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Take care of you,