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New Rules: Kindsight…Practice Being Kind to Yourself (for past and present mistakes)

PublicDomainPictures / Pixabay

PublicDomainPictures / Pixabay

View your life with KINDSIGHT
Stop beating yourself up about things from your past.
Instead of slapping your forehead and asking,
“What was I thinking?”
Breathe and ask yourself the kinder question,
“What was I learning?”
– Karen Salmansohn

A friend of mine sent me the above quote and I thought I’d share it with you. It certainly applies to all of us at any given moment. If you’re like me you’re always literally or figuratively slapping your forehead and wondering what the heck you were thinking in regards to something you said, did, didn’t say or do.

We can find a thousand things a day to chastise ourselves over and feel guilty about but what if you changed your perspective completely and embraced all your countless mistakes and mishaps, bad decisions, and less than stellar moments and thought of them as a multitude of blessings and opportunities to learn and grow.

I personally think Ms. Salmansohn is onto something here with her twist on hindsight.

Yes, Kindsight is the new hindsight. It’s not about looking back and kicking yourself. It’s about learning the lesson and looking forward.

Judge yourself less for your past mistakes and daily missteps and instead look for the message, the theme, the lesson life is trying to show you. Because as a 40-something year old I have certainly come to see life as a never-ending course with many lessons to learn and opportunities to grow.

It’s really why we are here, to figure out what our lessons are and to be about the business of learning them and self-correcting. So no need to beat yourself up for getting it wrong. Instead, be kind to yourself and forgive yourself.  No matter what the outcome, you’ll do better next time or eventually, as some of us take a little longer to get the lesson on some things.

This is especially important for us mamas who are always dealing with mommy guilt on some level. Many of us are constantly beating ourselves up for mistakes we’ve made as we figure out how to best parent our particular children. Look they (our children) don’t come with a manual and there is no one right way to parent each and every child. We are going to make mistakes and get it wrong in more ways and on more days than we care to admit.

Just remember, you’re not failing and you’re not a bad person…you’re growing and learning! Not only as a mother but as a woman with a lot of shit on her plate. 

So lighten up. None of it is the end of the world. Tomorrow is another day and an opportunity to begin again as long as you’re not stuck in what you did yesterday, last week or three years ago. Learn the lesson. Let it go and move on. And do better next time. Got it. Good!

Now how have you been denying yourself the kindness to learn and grow without beating yourself up for mistakes both past and present? Please share your thoughts below.

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